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I Have a summary of Desirable Qualities. Just why is it hard for ladies to devote?

Reader Question:

Me: 46 yrs old, African-American male, pro job, property owner, good-looking, 20-year-old son. I date outside my personal battle. Im in excellent shape.

It seems whenever ladies want to have a committed commitment, they do not should invest in me. I do have a “list” of attractive traits — attractive, able to manage the woman finances, a social or nondrinker and someone who is actually ready and able to travel and do things.

Just why is it hard for ladies to commit as I give external signs and symptoms of planning to be in a committed union?

-Mark (Ca)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Solution:

Dear Mark,

Certainly, too many ladies are behaving like guys (or how they THINK guys behave) and generally are steering clear of commitment. With that said, i’ll show there are a lot more ladies who desire a secure accessory than perhaps not.

I am wondering the reasons why you might seem to get keen on ladies who prevent a solid relationship. Could this be your choice in goals?

My suggestion would be to speak with women whom you may well not in the beginning be attracted to to discover if you limber up in their mind. Sometimes all of our failure to find a safe union relates to the worries of abandonment.

Put differently, we chose partners who can not get close to protect united states from becoming “dangerously” close and exposure abandonment.

Try matchmaking the type of person you’ve never, previously outdated before. Go slow. And pay attention to your feelings along the way.

Can you be conveniently jealous, wish to get a grip on the woman time or wish to secure the deal too quickly? The secret is include your self and quell your very own fears.

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